Halflingworld is a roleplaying game for Jared, because he asked for it. It has only 3 rules.

Rule One: yur Dead!

Because all halflings in any John Wick game, book or novel will always be dead, you are dead in this one as well!

Rule Two: yur Still Dead, so keep Still!

Because you're dead, you don't move around all that much anymore. Keep as perfectly still as you can. For every minute you're perfectly still, you get one Experience Point. You can't really spend your Experience Points because… well, everyone stops learning ten minutes after they're dead. Since you are dead, you just gather XPs and don't ever use them.

And for those of you rule mongers out there: yes, breathing counts as moving.

Rule Three: yur Dead Now, so Shut up!

Because of your previously mentioned affliction, you also are forbidden from speaking. If you do speak, the game master will give you The Big Smackdown Along Side Your Candy-Ass Head! This is explained in the Game Master section of this book, sold separately ($29.99) at www.wickedpress.com.

That's it! But remember, the Golden Rule of any Wicked Press product is: Have Fun!

(Since it is statistically impossible to have fun playing a halfling [proven by Bainbridge Scholars of London], maybe you should consider your choice of character race more closely next time.)